Friday, 17 February 2012

Better Than Her (3)

That speech, it shivered me. It couldn’t be real, it just can’t. How she looked at that age, everybody came to a shock. They all started to look at me, as if I was so familiar to that picture. I didn’t take notice till I realized that beady eyes were looking at me and whispering my name. I took a better look at that picture and it startle me.
That girl, she looked fairly familiar. But I can’t have, there are many people in the world who looks exactly the same. But, in second thought she did looked the same as me. She had red hair, like I used to have. Big blue eyes which starred with those dimples and it ticked me that she had the same beauty mark on the cheek. But it was a faulty picture; it can’t be the actual picture as it was taken so long ago. The camera must have been a cheap one, which takes poor looking pics and have flows on them.
“She looked exactly like Angelina Fay!” One girl stated out and the others just swung their head right towards to me. I thought I was invisible to their eyes, but somehow they could see me clearly.
“Yes she does, but she has brown hair,” said the detective. I lower my head, feeling quit annoyed. “All right students, carry on” and he went on and on about that girl. It upset me. I just wished I could skip school and celebrate my birthday on a better pace.
Once it was all finished, I was the first one to get out of that hell hole. I didn’t want to look at other people faces as they wanted to get a better look at me.  Ah, why can’t I just change my face instead of my hair?
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As time passed, school was over. I stayed in the girls’ toilet for almost half an hour, Mrs. Dean looked at me as if I was going to throw up, and I did. It sickened me so much about this whole Carolina thing. If I go just around the corner at the end of the block, another thing would appear about Carolina and if I just enter the hallways at school, the hot topic would be about CJ.
Where’s the knife? I needed it right now, I’m ready.
I opened my backpack and took out my hand knife. Yes it was all perfect, Angelina Carter, the Carolina Jones look alike was found dead in the girl’s toilet. Angelina Carter committed suicide at Rainview Eagle High, one of the top schools in the States. But if I think again, it would be a stupid decision, taking my own life for something as dumb as that nonsense CJ. But, what about mum? Without me in her life she could afford anything much easier rather than wasting money on me. But I can’t, she was the one who founded me at that well, she was the one who took the risk into taking care of a strangers child and she was the one who gave me all the love needed by somebody in need. But, what about just one cut? Just one won’t hurt right? Maybe one beautiful looking cut right on my beauty mark.
Taking out my pen and then drawing a line on my cheek. Pushing the knife out from the case to a perfect length. Then placing the blade at the tip of the drawn line. This is it, I actually feel good about doing this. At least, after this no one will say I look like Carolina Jones.
Pressing down the blade to start the cut. Blood started to appear out from my flesh.  Oh, god it felt fresh. I felt newer.
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“Oh, you haven’t gone home yet?”
She startled me; I quickly hide the knife and wiped off the dripping blood on floor. “ Um, er, yes, my mum is picking me up late.” I flung around, and all I saw was a petite young blonde in glasses. She was in a startle once she saw me. “Oh, my, what happened to your face?” Then I realized I forgotten to wipe off the blood from my face. “Um, it was just an accident. Something sharp razed on my face. Don’t worry I’m fine” Wow, that has been the longest conversation I had with somebody. She took out a tissue from her bag and hand it to me. I thanked her and wiped of the remaining blood from my face. And once it was all off, she came to another startle. “It’s you, you’re Angelina Carter. The girl who looks like Carolina Jones.” I started to feel annoyed by her presence. “Well, yes I’m Angelina Carter. But I don’t think I look anything like Carolina Jones.” I said and took my bag to head out from the toilet. She followed me out and stopped me. “I’m Gina Dawn. I’m a Librarian Assistant” she shook my hand and gave out a pretty smile. “Well, you know who I am” and I walked off. She stopped me again and felt rather bugged. “Angelina, you looked as if troubled. Is there anything that is going on?” she asked me curiously. She was right. Something did bother me, I bit my lips and shrugged.                                                            

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