Monday, 5 January 2015

It's a new year.


I've been missing for such a long long time and I apologize. I have another blog, it's a story blog. I post my stories there instead of here. So if you're wondering where are the other chapters of Restrain or any other up coming stories, they're all at my story blog :)

So a little update on my life, on 2014, on so far 2015.

Let me just say, 2014 is a bullshit year.

For me, there's a lot of conflicts. I've lost friends. People who I used to help out then abandon me like trash. Well good for you. Happy new year.

I've never felt so deceived, used, fitnah upon ever in my life. And I pray you success along side with millions of emptiness, because you're delusional. I'm sorry, but I'm angry. I hate 2014. Everything about it. The people in it.

But, I'm not a bitch. I don't hold grudges and pray you to die in a tragic death where your pictures of blown up body parts are scattered everywhere and cars going over them, passed on on WhatsApp or Wechat or whatever. I'm still hurt, yes. But I'm always open in the idea of forgiveness and forgetting.
But, if you're still that delusional prick, a hypocritical baboon; then let it be. I want to succeed in life and the afterlife, and I don't need people like you to bring me down.

There are people I'm thankful for in my life, I'm thankful to my seniors, Acha, Kak Wawa, Kak Aini and all the rest, who made me happy, loved me like a big sister, came to me when I needed help. And then there's my juniors, whom made me feel appreciated and loved and happy to be around with. I love them all, there's so many juniors that I love, so many to name out, I'm thankful. I love all of you. And I pray for your success and happiness, dunia and akhirat.AMIN.

And my sahabats, Ku, Aliah, Aisyah, Anis, and many more. Whom made me cry, laugh, choke, and turned me into a complete idiot. You guys have been very supportive, known my weakness and strengths, came to me when I needed you the most, accepted my flaws and ratchetness, fix me up when I was a hot mess, loved me when I felt like no one loved me. You guys are my world, I love you so much. I pray that we'll all succeed in SPM, straight A's BAM, or the least, Lulus in satisfaction. I pray that you guys succeed in life, and the afterlife. I pray that you'll grow up happy. I pray that your children are beautiful and a husband that is loyal. I pray for all the good in life for you guys. I love you guys , thick and thin, no matter what, Amin xo

And then there's my best friends bitch friends. Jay and Grape. I'm not going to go all mushy on you guys because then Jay will say 'Mango is weird' and Grape will be full of himself. But, I want to thank you guys for all the awesome night of stupid, weird conversations. You guys sharing your dreams, problems, and us trying to fix them together. Like I said, we'll be famous hosts of LTS once after SPM. I want to thank you guys for making me laugh till my intestines felt like exploding, making me happy when I had a bad day. I pray that, what ever dream upon will come true. Jay and I becoming famous writers, plus Jay wanting to be an actor and singer and all that, and Grape wanting to work at the zoo probably own one. But overall, we become great host of a show. Amin.

2014 was full of ups and downs, a lot of sad moments, crying, depression, but now that it's 2015, I'm hoping for a year that starts of good, goes on good, ends with good. I hope that SPM will go smootly for me, me conquering the studies and then getting straight A's for SPM. Amin.

So, this year, I'll be sitting alone, again. I don't mind. I like my space. But I have my most favourite people sitting near with me this year and I'm so excited to start of my studies with them with me. Ku and Anis in front, while Aliah and Aisyah behind me. New tables, new chairs, new teachers.

And wow, I'm a senior. I can't believe it since it felt just like yesterday when I got back to Malaysia, so clueless. And the year I took UPSR, so nervous as hell. And I then went through PMR, the best year of my life so far. And now SPM. I pray to Allah, that everything goes as plan. Amin.

Hopefully, 2015 will be taking 2013's spot.

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