Saturday, 9 July 2016

I Know You - Chapter 10

There, in front of me were arrays of clothing that I personally in a million years would never, ever, choose upon to purchase and wear. Between every pink dresses and floral shorts was Amber going through each item, picking out what attracted her eyes, pulling the fabric closer in between her freshly manicured nails and then looking at the price tag. “Bianca, this will look fabulous on you” she said as she pulled out a pink short dress that had floral designs on the bottom half. I slanted my head, staring at the so called clothing that was made to make me look fabulous. “Like, is everyone dressing up to the party?” I asked as I took hold on the dress, placing it against me and looking at myself in the mirror, nope too girly.

Well,” Amber mumbled as she went through another rack besides the dresses.
“Since it's Kelly Hicks party, you do want to look your best. Common, Kelly Hicks, she has a standard and we got to play by her standards” then Amber pulled out a black chic jumpsuit and placed it against her, “what do you think?” she asked.

Don't you not have one already?” I said as I placed the pink dress back on the rack.
“No, the other one is denim, this one is satin like texture, but since the party is at night probably not the best choice. Hmm, maybe something flashier” Amber placed the jumpsuit back to its original place, her back was facing me, busy going through the rack and then she mumbled “Bianca, go ahead and search for something cute at the other side of the store”. I nodded, though I knew she wouldn't acknowledge the fact that I nodded, I went ahead and walked around the store.

Everything here seemed to have its standards, like the clothing were only for specific wearers and I knew I didn't fit the category. It was either an okay price or just too expensive to be worn for just one time. Looking around, I could see faces of girls that spent more money on makeup than their education fees. There I was, in a plain red t-shirt and gray sweatpants, hair tied into a messy bun and eye bags behind my glasses, surrounded by beautiful things and beautiful people; feeling not the slightest bit cautious on how I looked because I felt comfortable in my skin. Then I looked over to Amber; her head was still buried into the racks and I'm afraid she will end up stumbling into the racks of clothes and her body wouldn't ever be found. Well, at least I don't need to go to the party tonight and have my extra hours of studying Algebra.

I went to a section, a section that was fully dedicated to hats and I looked around me, making sure no one was aware to what I was about to do. I picked up one hat, a nice big hat that had a silk ribbon around it and I placed it on my head. I looked at myself in the mirror, felt something was odd and then I decided to put of my glasses, just to see how different I looked. I see myself, feeling oddly like Kate Middleton. I slant my head, gosh Bianca don't you look classy. My heart gave a little giggle, at least I found something to make use of time while waiting for Amber to come back from her scavengers hunt.

Damn you're beautiful,” a voice spoke behind me and my body startled. I turned around, and I sighed out. “What are you doing here?” I asked as I quickly pulled off the hat from my head, back on the rack and then placed my glasses back on. Aaron shrugged, “accompanying my mother to shop, how about you?”

Accompanying Amber,” I said,
on what?” he asked,
to shop,” I replied,
for what?” he asked more, God he's annoying.
for none of your business” I said sharply. Aaron nodded, “want to go for ice-cream while waiting for them?” he asked. I shrugged and looked over to Amber, hoping that she'll notice my emergency cries.

“Oh come on, it'll take an hour before they find the right dress” Aaron said, and before I could decline, he grabbed onto my hand to follow him out from the store. Before I knew it, it was as if he was kidnapping me. Deep inside, I prayed he wasn't plotting a revenge on me after nights of rejections.

He held onto my hand tightly, and it bothered me the fact that he didn't felt bothered by my hands that were sweating vigorously like a sloppy pig. We reached to Baskin-Robbins, and he finally let go of my hand, told me to sit down whilst he go and grab ice-cream for the both of us. I slumped down on the chair, slightly annoyed and slightly looking forward to what flavor he was about to get me. I looked at the store where Amber was in, I could see the insides and I could see that Amber was still busy looking at the clothes. I looked down at my watch, 6.00 pm, within another three hours I probably be at a place where I'd regret for the next breathing years.

“Here you go,” Aaron sat down in front of me as he slid a pink cup towards me. I looked at it, it was pistachio, my favorite. I looked at him, and I tried to search for another pink cup.
“What? We're sharing?” I questioned as I scooped a decent amount and shamelessly ate the delicious nutty green ice-cream. Aaron shook his head, then allowed both hands to support his head as he watched me scoop more and ate. I stopped after three scoops and pushed the pink cup towards him, “here you paid, eat some” I said. He pushed it back to me, and I, knew for sure that I wasn't dragged here to play some sort of flirtation game.
I want to watch you eat” he said, I was taken aback. “Look Aaron, you're a creep” I blurted it out as I took hold of the pink cup since he didn't want none of it. Suits him.
No,” he said and sighed, “just in love” he continued. I sighed inside, but I couldn't help it so I sighed out loud.

Aaron, I told you -”
Yeah I know, I know. Can't a guy not appreciate a girl he has to fight for?”
And what on mother nature is that even suppose to mean?”
Just a statement Bianca,”
Look Aaron, you look so much better now, that hair, you're a handsome guy, can't you not go chase a prettier girl?”
No,” he said.
No?” I leaned in, frowning.
I don't chase, I fight. I'm fighting for you”
God sake's Aaron” I put the empty pink cup down, “freaking fight for me for what? What kind of competition are you in?”
Jeremy,” he said. I choked. “Bear?” I lifted an eyebrow. “What does he have to do in all of this?”

Before Aaron could explained, Amber came up to me. I looked at her, she was holding two bags, and I dead knew she bought something for me, I was horrified.

Oh hey Aaron” Amber said,
Hey, what are you shopping for?” he asked and before I could stop her from telling, before I could do some telepathy stunt, before I could do voodoo on her, she said it, “Kelly Hicks Party, we're going tonight. You're going right?” Amber sat down in between us. Aaron lifted a brow at me, then he looked back to Amber, “definitely” he said. Seconds later, his mother came out from the store. Aaron pushed his chair back and got up, “I guess, I'll see you tonight Bianca” he smiled and walked away.
My whole body shivered. Goosebumps rosed from every inch of my arms, fine hairs stood up stiff. I felt nausea, I want ed to throw up all the green cream bought by the guy that made me feel most uncomfortable than any other person.
Wow he's dead ass into you” Amber blurted out once Aaron left the table. I had a sudden migraine, “I think I'm going to be sick,” I said as I touch my forehead.
Now you little peace of turd, you promised. The party is in two hours”
So?” I said bluntly,
So?” Amber repeated it like I was saying something stupid, I guessed I did. Because as soon as I said so we were back at Amber's place, getting ready for the party.

Here,” Amber gave me a shopping bag, I knew the contents.
Wear that and I'll do your make up after” Amber said as she sat down in front of her vanity table. I took the bag into the bathroom, I was honestly shaking. I didn't want to let down Amber by making a fuss because we already had a petty fight on me not wanting to go to this stupid party. I opened the bag, I didn't look in but instead I closed my eyes and put my hands in there, slowly pulling out what felt like a single item of clothing, please please not something slutty oh God. I lifted it up and slowly I opened my eyes. I don't know what to feel of it. I wore it, got out of the bathroom, adjusting it along the way and stood there behind Amber who was applying mascara.

I felt very insecure.

Amber who saw me from the mirror, turned around. She stared at me and kept quiet.

What? I look stupid right? Gosh, I'm a prostitute in this” I freaked out as I pulled down the white lace dress believing it would actually stretch it's length.
Gosh Bianca,” Amber got up and walked up to me.
“Why do you abuse yourself so much by wearing all those rags? You look freaking amazing, God I'm so proud!” Amber hugged me, and I was shockingly surprised.

Bianca, you're a princess in this already. But...let me work my magic and turn you into a Greek goddess” Amber pulled my arm and sat me down at her vanity table. She started pulling out all kinds of makeup from the thick creams to a color fiesta. She pulled my hair back and tied it into a pony tail. Finally it was all done, and she turned me around. She examined me, like there was something wrong to her artwork. Then she pulled off my glasses, and gave me my lens that I kept in my bag, telling me to wear it on. “Bianca...” she sighed,

What? I knew it... I knew it, I'm a pimp” I blurted.
Bianca, shut up and love yourself more. You look fabulous”


I sat down on the passengers seat whilst Amber drove to Kelly Hick's house. I don't know why I felt nervous, why my hands were getting sweaty, why my heart was beating fast. Honestly, I've never been to a party before, my life revolved around books and good grades. Mom and Dad both gave me the green flag, they didn't even set a curfew time, they were like “we trust you to take care of yourself and have fun Bianca. Not too much fun, but have a good time sweetie”. My legs were shaking badly and I guessed Amber noticed so she took my hands whilst driving with one hand. “Don't worry, you'll be fine”. We finally arrived at the avenue and Amber parked two houses away.

We gotten out of the car and I could see many kids from my school walking up to the house that was like a sore thumb in a row of houses. Everybody dressed up to impress, everybody looked gorgeous.
We followed were the rest were going, then somebody called Amber from behind. We turned around and who else was it to be but Aaron. He jogged up to us. He wore a casual black buttoned-down shirt and blue tight jeans. His bangs that became a quiff that day was combed down covering his forehead.

Hey Amber, Bianca isn't with you?” then he turned his eyes at me, he sighed, then rubbed his temples. “Bianca, you're killing me” he pounded his chest with a fist. I turned around, “Thank God, call the cops and sentence me to life in prison without parole”.

We were at the doors of the house and I could see the contents of what was to be my first party. Lights were changing colors, people walking in and out, laughter broke out.
Amber walked in first, then I did, followed suit by Aaron. Kelly Hicks was at the door and she greeted us, “Have fun guys, the food is over there, drinks over at that side, knock and break something, pay double of it's original price. And I'm not kidding” and she was gone. Amber turned to me, she smiled, and as the music in the house was getting louder, people started filling in, Amber said she wanted to go meet some of her other friends, leaned in and whispered “if any emergency text me” and she left me with Aaron.

He placed his arm around my shoulders, “hungry?” he asked. I pushed his arm off, “no thank you” and looked around. Unbelievably, half of the people here I barely recognize. There were faces that I knew by heart and there were faces that made me second guess their actual existences. The music then changed to an up beat song, people started dancing, and Aaron turned around, took one hand out.

Please, may I have just one dance with the prettiest girl tonight?” and this time he said it nicely, like he had given up. I gave in, slowly feeling unsure, placed one hand on his. He pulled me gently in and we danced. How awkward it was, I started easing up. Despite how wild everybody was around us, nobody took noticed of what lousy dancers we were. Aaron broke out laughing, “you're pretty good. Are you sure you only lived by books?” he said as he swung his hands in the air. “I think I read about dancing somewhere,” I told him, “well, you're a natural” Aaron smiled. And I felt somewhat at ease. This was the Aaron I hadn't seen. Not the anxious creep always on my trail, but out going and relaxed Aaron. The music changed, and we stopped dancing. Aaron panted, “I'll go and get us drinks. What would you want?” he asked.

Anything is fine, none alcoholic that is” I answered and Aaron nodded, left me in a sea of people. What supposedly to be a two minute grab, seemed to be taking forever. The music was getting louder and louder, I couldn't find Amber anywhere and I felt a rush of anxiety all of the sudden. I looked around to see where was Aaron and he was missing in action as well. I walked around, reached to an area that looked too grand to be a kitchen, found a door that lead me outside to a backyard of Kelly Hick's house.

Nobody was there but me, everybody seemed only to stayed inside. I looked around, who knows, maybe there was a lurking breathing soul, but yet again, everyone was talking and having fun with everyone besides me inside. Ten yards away was a long swing attached to a branch of a tree overlooking a flower garden. I sat down gently making sure it supported my weight.

I sighed out. Somehow all the loud music from the inside was blocked from my ears and was replaced by the sounds of a gentle breeze and an acapella of crickets. Moments later, somebody sat besides me and handed me a cup, “What took you so long?” I said and turned around to him. I froze.

I wasn't sure when to apologize” Bear said as he took a sip from his cup. I looked down at my cup, it was juice.
Uhm, how uh, how have you been Bear?” I cleared my throat, looking back up to him, noticing bruises under his eyes, torn lips, and whenever the breeze swept his hair aside, I could see purple marks on his forehead. His hair was messy like always, wore a black jacket over a gray shirt and ripped jeans. Definitely not the standards of Kelly Hicks.
Like shit. You?” he asked, looking at me in the eyes, those eyes.
“The usual, I guess” I said. Bear nodded and took another gulp of his drink, emptying his cup. He then scrunch it like scrap and threw it at the bed of flowers.
Hey,” I whispered, looking behind us whether there were people staring. For sure, no one was.

Sometimes a pretty situation turns ugly, quickly, and it's hard to make it back to normal unless I, go and pick up the cup” he said. I knew he was referring to that evening.

Bear leaned in, placing his head on my shoulder. I froze. He sighed.

I miss you Bianca,” he said softly.

I miss you, every, single, day for the past three weeks”

He paused for a moment,

I miss you Polar Bear, please forgive me” he continued to speak in the most fragile voice that I deeply, very much missed too.

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